This parenting thing is hard work. Or maybe I put too much pressure on myself. I'm no expert by any means so I often find myself questioning my decisions: wondering how something will affect these little people we're raising or how it will come back to bite me in the years to come.
Last Halloween, we had an absolute blast. We went with some of our best friends to a nearby (rich) neighborhood and went door-to-door filling our buckets until they were too heavy for little hands to carry. The streets were filled with trick-or-treaters, as my friend put it, "like something out of a movie." The quintessential Halloween. It was a great time.
Which made things difficult when Halloween rolled around this year. We struggled with what to do. Was it more important to have fun or more important to do the "right" thing and only go to homes we know? Would we forever ruin Halloween if we didn't let our kids go back and experience the perfect Halloween?
Well, after much discussion, we decided to make our children hate us and only go to homes we know. No, we didn't go to as many places as last year and no, we didn't get as much candy, and yes, it was a huge pain getting in and out of carseats at each stop. (No door-to-door in our "neighborhood" out in the boonies.) But we discovered some hidden blessings in being the "mean" parents. We introduced ourselves to some new neighbors that we've been meaning to meet; Halloween gave us an excuse to stop. We got to visit with our neighbors who have been married for 60+ years and never have trick-or-treaters. Doug exclaimed, "We were hoping you'd stop! I told Gail to get some candy!" I know the girls made their night.
We got the "special" treatment at Sassy's librarian's house--who happens to be my dear friend--because we got to go IN and visit unlike all the other trick-or-treaters on the porch.
Another friend was SO excited that we were coming. She and her teenage daughter never have trick-or-treaters. I don't know what was cuter, seeing the girls walk up her steps, or seeing Michelle rush back in the house and stage the scene. "Oh, who could it be? Ohhhh, trick or treaters!"
Sassy did complain a few times that she didn't get as much candy but I told her to look again: her bucket was full of love. Not sure she bought that one.
But my heart was full. It's hard to move away from family and friends, especially after you have kids. But then you find people who love you, and love your kids, and become your family away from home. And I hope that after a few years, THIS will become our quintessential Halloween. I guess if it makes me the mean parent by taking my kids to see people who love them, then I'm guilty as charged.
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