Fun and Games

Every year, November and December nearly kill me.  We travel three times back to the state where we grew up (one family is five hours round trip, the other ten!) and then we have Christmas programs, parties, shopping. . .   There are never enough weekends to get it all done.  And then comes January and February.  Apparently I'm never happy because we go from run-run-run to. . . . NOTHING.  And it drives me crazy!  This year has been even worse because R is studying for a big test at work and not only do we have few plans, but yours truly is carrying more of the kid-load while he uses weekends to study.  (A huge shout-out to R for all that he does.  I don't realize how wonderful he is until I'm doing it all!)  Soooo. . . .at the B house, we've been trying to keep occupied.  And out of Daddy's hair.  Poor guy has resorted to sitting in one of the living rooms with ear plugs!  HA!

We've been doing lots of board games.  Ke got Uno Moo for Christmas and while I get bored of playing (AGAIN), I never tire of hearing the giggles when someone gets "skunked."  Oh my, it is FUNNY.  We've also been doing a lot of Cranium and Blockus (Daddy even takes a break to play because it's THAT fun.)  Ke doesn't quite get the concept--she just warns us that she's getting in our "air-uh-toria" (territory)--but it's great to see Sassy strategize and figure out which tile to play next.  She is definitely a spatial learner!  Ke has become a huge fan of Miss May (aka Old Maid.)  We even came up with an easy way for her to hold the cards:

We've also had several movie nights and this mama was on cloud nine when they picked Hairspray one night.  Helllllloooo Zac!  Way easier on the eyes than Disney!  :)  On the way to school one morning, Ke was repeatedly asking to watch "Sparkle of the Meat" and even my interpreter, Sassy, couldn't translate.  Ke just kept saying, "Sparkle of the Meat!"  Finally she started explaining it and Sassy burst out:  "Despicable Me?"  HAHA!  Oh we laughed HARD.  We may forever call that movie "Sparkle of the Meat." 

Over Christmas, Sassy had some homework: send a gingerbread cut-out to someone out of state and have them mail him/her back to the classroom.  After break, the class got to open their envelopes and learn a little about the state they had visited.  "Ginger" had a great time in California with Aunt Mo and Uncle Bear:

 
SO jealous of her day at the beach! Thanks to our family for making one little first grader SO excited!

Then it was time for the 100th day of school and she got to dress like she was 100.

She's been looking forward to this for a whole year ("No fair, the first graders get to dress up!") so it was really fun.  Her class also did a bucket list of stuff they want to do before they turn 100.  (All her own spelling and words.)  LOVE.

1. Go to Yosemite National park (She just read a book about this.  We've decided to camp there someday!)
2. Get a pet panda
3. Try sushi
4. Discover the Conctacon Cordian (Ummm, that would be the Costa Concordia--the Italian ship that sank last year.  The girl is a sponge.) 
5. See the Eifel tower
6. Get an Ipad
7. Go ziplineing
8. Be a hairdresser
9. Go to the North pole
10. Set a Ginness world record

She's also been doing a lot of art projects.  I'm constantly impressed by the things her art teacher has them create.  This was a recent lesson:   "After reading Snowmen at Night, and a demonstration on blending with pastels, students created their own snowman doing whatever they wanted their snowman to do! They had to show the values on the snowman and the snowman cast shadow based on the position of the moon."  Ummmm, values?  I'm not even sure what that means.  I love having her work framed in our house.  Warm fuzzies. 

Ke's been doing her own artwork.  One day I was going through her papers and found a picture of her teacher, Miss S:

She insists that she did it, even after the extensive interrogation I gave her.  Poor girl.  ha!  Over night, she's writing her name on everything and coloring SO well, and apparently doing eyelashes and smiles.  I think I blinked even faster with #2.  I can't believe how much she's growing up!

Last weekend we did Valentine boxes--no Pinterest needed!  I had decided that I didn't want to be one of those moms who does it all--I wanted some ideas that the girls could do too.  We decided to think of characters that would be easy to re-create.  First up was Backpack.  I just covered a cereal box with purple wrapping paper (Cheapskate here can use the rest of the roll later. . .) and then hot glued purple ribbon on for straps.  I drew his face, Ke colored it, then we cut it out and glued it on.  Sassy's Lalaloopsy was a little more time consuming.  We used a cute box from fundraiser cookie dough (no wrapping necessary!), she colored and cut out a face, then we glued on two buttons, yarn and a bow off one of her backpacks.  Then she drew on a smile and eyelashes, and cut out two pink cheeks.  I was pretty happy with how they turned out and I love that the girls have their own little touches on them. 

Finally we made valentines for our families.  I had the girls paint all over some paper and the next day, I traced their hands and then cut them out.  See the project here.  Butterflies!  It was "easy" until I realized that we needed 16 of them!!!  Two in each envelope for six aunties/uncles and two set of grandparents.  Whew.  That was a LOT of tracing and cutting!  I included a little poem:

It's 2013 and these butterflies
are our little hands, the shape and the size.
We made them for you and sent them your way
To wish you a Happy Valentine's Day! 

And now I need to make one more set so I can remember what their hands looked like! 

I've been kind of pouty on the weekends because we haven't had a lot to do.  But then I realize that this past week, we didn't turn a TV on for 48 hours.  And I read this post and realize how busy we've truly been.  Funny how when you do a whole lot of nothing with the people who mean everything, it becomes a whole lot of SOMETHING.

More Stinkus-isms

1. "Of course!" Me: Can I have a hug? Ke, formerly known as Stinkus: "Of course you can!" Me: Did you clean your room by yourself? Ke: "Of course I did!" And of COURSE, she doesn't quite say "course" correctly so it's even cuter.

2. I think we're in trouble with a boy-CRAZY girl. She came home from daycare one day and told us she was marrying Carson. Which was the first time I'd ever heard of anyone named Carson. "Who's Carson?" I asked. "He told me I booooo-ti-ful. . . " she answered, batting her eyelashes and flipping her hair. She was literally beaming, and enjoying it a little too much. She decided last summer that she was going to marry her friend Will, despite his very obvious refusal. I think there were even some tears shed: "Her said she's going to marry me!" Insert tears here. The girl's not taking no for an answer! Another night she revealed at dinner that she tried to kiss Alexander today but (pouting) "Hims got away." Mothers with small boys, lock them up NOW.

3. So far, she's NOT outgrowing the "Hold me, hold me, hold me. . . ." Which has become "Homa me" for some reason. . . Somedays I'm grateful for the extra loves, and somedays I'm trying not to pull my hair out. As independent and fiery as this one is, I've said since she was tiny that she'd crawl back inside if she could. :)

4. A few nights ago, I heard something that I thought wouldn't happen for about ten more years.  An angry, tearful daughter stormed out of the kitchen and stomped to her room, yelling, "Dis is the worst night EVER!"  Big dramatic pause.  "And you is da worst mudder EVER!"

A little back story.  My family is guilty of underestimating the amount of time we have in the evenings.  I leave work, all geared up to 1) fold the heaping baskets of laundry that have become decor in my living areas, 2) sweep up the never-ending crumbs under the bar from breakfast (and on more days than I want to admit, clean up the breakfast dishes ON the bar. . .), 3) whip up a fabulous, homemade meal that everyone will LOVE and eat and not pick through to see exactly what ingredients I used and try to find a few lone bites that are acceptable and not contaminated by anything gross.  Unfortunately, I get home and my couch beckons me and my "To-Do" list becomes a little shorter.  You know, we can just dig through those clothes to find outfits--it's like having a dresser in the dining room. . .  And there will just be more crumbs tomorrow.  Plus it's almost dark.  If I just turn on one lamp in here, I can't even see them! 

Anyway, my girls have inherited my ambitions. . .  as well as the lack of follow-through. . . .  That night, Sassy planned to organize her desk.  She even said, "I just LOVE organizing things!"  Hello, little apple from my tree!  She started, but let's just say, it still needs a lot of organizing.  Ke decided she wanted to do Play Doh--and watch a movie.  I despise Play Doh.  I like that it keeps them entertained, and it IS fun, especially with the cool molds and accessories that they have.  But clean up makes me want to scream.  It crumbles and flakes and then they step on it and track it all over the house (which adds to the crumbs I still need to clean up) and then it's all smushed into their socks (which just makes laundry worse).  So after that, dinner was late and it was a bath night so we were pressed for time.  Ke decided it was time to play beauty shop, despite my reminders that we needed to get in the bath.  By the time they decided to listen, it was way too late for a movie.  Cut to door slamming above.

So I convince her that the next night is Friday, we don't have to take baths or go to bed early, and we can watch a ton of movies.  "Oh but wait," I say, "The worst mother in the world would NEVER do movie night. . .   And I'm the worst mother ever. . . "

"Wellll. . . ." she answers sheepishly and I'm totally ready for her to sing my praises and thank me for almost four years of maternal blood, sweat and tears.  "You just da worst mudder today.  Maybe to-mah-whoa you be a better mudder."  Oh, lovey.  You're always going to keep me on my toes, aren't you?

5. Today as I'm finishing up lunch, I hear a very urgent:  "Mom!  I pooped!" and she didn't come and announce to the world that she needed to beforehand.  Hence my panicked reply:  "On the toilet?"

"No. . . ."  Oh fabulous. . . "IN the toilet!"

Oh this girlie makes me laugh.  And grow gray hair.                  

Keeping Score

I'm continually amazed at how fun life is through the eyes of a child.  We took the girls bowling last weekend with some friends.  I've been bowling.  It's fun, but nothing to write home about.  Probably because I stink.  While it's normal for my cousins to bowl 280+, I'm lucky to hit 100.  But this was the girls' first time together and my heart was about to burst in the first few frames.  They LOVED it.

First was the excitement over the black lights and discovering all the ways we glowed.  Ke giggled like crazy every time she pushed the ball down the ramp, then jumped and stomped and laughed. . . . even when it knocked nothing down. 

Sassy was jumping up and down too, and squealing with pure joy. . .  until she noticed the scoreboard.  Ugh.  My little perfectionist who has always had everything come easy to her was suddenly way more interested in everyone's score.  And who was ahead of her.  And then the pouting, sulking and TEARS (yes, tears) started.  Especially when one of the little girls was beating her.  Because (insert sarcasm here) they had SUCH strategy in pushing the ball down the ramp and watching it creep down the lane, hit a bumper and knock over some random pins.  I was SO frustrated.  Sassy wanted to quit, she refused to acknowledge her friend when A got a strike or a spare, and seeing the little girls get one nearly pushed her over the edge.  Grrr.  And of course, I tried to blame myself.  What had I done to make her this way?  Too much praise?  Too much pressure?  Too much glory as the oldest "golden" child?

And then I realized yet again---Uggghhh, she's ME.  How many times do I HAVE to be the best?  And how many times do I compare myself to others?  That woman is: really skinny, fun, pretty, fashionable, cute, tall, petite, etc.  She has: perfect hair, a cute purse, great shoes, a fabulous husband, expensive jewelry, etc.   That mom: makes homemade Play Doh, always does fun crafts, takes her kids to exotic museums, clips so many coupons that the store pays HER.  Their house is: bigger, nicer, prettier, better decorated, newer, etc.  Just the other day, I was stewing over something that someone else had (when I KNOW that's a Commandment to follow. . . ) and I heard a tiny voice whisper, "But you have Me."  And I suddenly realized how much I've been blessed with.  Not that others don't have Him, but I truly don't "NEED" anything.  Someday when I'm gone from this earth, nothing else will matter.  When I stop to realize everything I DO have, I'm embarrassed at how often I dwell on what I don't.  And all this time I've been telling Sassy that she won't be "the best," there will always be something else who is, and it's OK. . .  Why is it so hard to practice what you preach?

During the very last frame, A and her family went to the restroom, and go figure, Sassy got a strike. 

She squealed, yelled, and jumped up and down.  I was SO glad that she got to feel that.  But of course, I had to remind her:  "Wouldn't you have wanted A to be here to celebrate?  Maybe she wanted YOU to celebrate earlier with her."  On the way home, Sassy commented that she apologized to A for acting the way she did.  I was shocked.  And proud.  Without any prompting whatsoever, Sassy realized that she wasn't acting appropriately and she took responsibility for her actions.  A great way to end the night.

If she's anything like her mama, she'll probably always struggle with comparing herself to others and trying to be the "best."  (An unrealistic goal that's never attainable. . .why doesn't her mama see that?)  But I'll take the unsolicited apology.  Even if I'm not the skinny, perfect, fashionable mom with the cute purse who takes the girls to exotic museums, I'm still doing something right.  And not that we're keeping score, but that's gotta count for something.  :)             

Gifts

I doubt that the Mayans (haha. . .) had New Year's Day on their calendar. I really don't know how it originated--maybe it was the brainchild of Richard Simmons to sell workout tapes? I know it's a hot time of year for diet books and gym memberships. . . And despite that (ha), I love New Year's. There's just something about the promise and hope of a new year. In all honesty, January 1 is no different than December 31--every day should be a new start, a clean slate. But it truly feels magical watching that ball drop, toasting those you love, and passing around lots of kisses (I love that we share this night with our babies too!) It's a chance to wish on the upcoming year, work on those resolutions (that we may or may not keep. . .) and wait for what God has in store.

At first glance, our past year was pretty uneventful. Some may even say "boring." There were no extravagant purchases or vacations. No major milestones or moments. No surprises or announcements. Which made it a GREAT year. I'm learning more and more to welcome and embrace the daily grind. Life is made up mostly of little, day-to-day moments and only broken up every once in a while by something "big." One of my constant resolutions is to focus on those little things. They're not always easy to acknowledge, but every night, I thank God for the blessings of the day that went unnoticed. Those are the true, quiet gifts that make up life. And in looking back over the past year, we were definitely blessed.

Our 2012 Gifts:

• Keke started a new daycare in February, which has turned out to be the BIGGEST blessing. This isn't the best picture but there she is in the middle-right, singing her little heart out during the Christmas program.  Boy did she sing!  I love that in this pic, the little boy standing in front of her is turned around to see where all that noise is coming from.  HA!  Thank you, God, for opening doors!  

• We became a diaper free household this year. . . hopefully in 2013 we can master the "staying dry overnight" thing. Oops.
• Sassy started first grade and she's had another great year.  Her big news of the year is that she has three less baby teeth in her mouth and a few extra bills in her piggy bank. :)
• Our new baby niece E was born in June, and we got to be her godparents a few months later.  Love her!
• We enjoyed lots of little getaways with family and friends--SUCH a fun summer!
• Baby S was born in November on the other side of the family--the girls are so excited to get a B cousin!!!  And that familiar, dark gorgeous hair makes this mama melt. . . .   (But not enough to conquer diapers again--sorry, aunties!)  

• We had one auntie, uncle and cousin move only two hours from us--YAY!--and one auntie and uncle move 1,000+ miles away--BOO. . . . but YAY for all of the amazing adventures they'll have and the trips we'll get to take!  Like Disneyland!  :)  We're excited to get together with the S Family more and happy for the O Family.  So fun to see what God has planned for our loved ones!
• We refinanced the house so maybe 2013 will be the year that we finish the basement. . . and dare I say, get rid of the blue toilet?!?  I almost hate to see it go.  I mean, we just moved here.  NINE years ago!!!  Nine years, really?  Can't believe we've been here that long.

We're excited to see what else 2013 brings.  Stay tuned for pictures of a (HOPEFULLY) white toilet.  And if you're in the market for a blue one, Hubby says he's putting it on eBay.  :)  Happy New Year!  

When Bad Things Happen

Nearly five years ago to the date, we rolled our truck on the way to our friends' house. I'll never forget seeing everything in slow motion as we approached the ditch, the horrific thud and crash, and then the seemingly never-ending silence before Sassy started screaming bloody murder. By the grace of God and our seatbelts, we were fine. R and I had scratches and bruises, but Sassy was unscathed. It didn't hit me until we got home. We tucked her in and I sat down on the couch and sobbed. I realized how fast everything could change. We could have been going to the morgue instead of putting our baby in bed. Instead, it was just a regular Saturday night like all the others before. We just needed a new truck.

Six weeks later my brother died unexpectedly. Just over a year later, we lost my niece. I remember sitting in the waiting room, leaning over and just letting my big fat tears fall on the floor. I was racked with grief, disbelief, sorrow and guilt--I was leaning over a five-month pregnant belly. I remember looking around at my broken family and telling God I was done. The God I trusted couldn't have let all of this happen to us.

Thankfully I didn't veer too far, and I hope that God has forgiven me for giving up on Him. I've grown a lot over the last few years, and I hope to grow even more in the future. R and I are doing a study group at church where we're watching a documentary series on Catholicism. Our meeting a few weeks ago focused on the existence of God and why bad things happen if there's a God. It of course didn't explain everything, but I loved this analogy.

The artist Georges Seurat did this entire painting in dots. As we watched the DVD, the camera was zoomed in on ONE dot and it was just a brown blob. Then they panned out a little bit and it was a few dots. Then they panned out a little more and it was a nose. Then a little more. A man's face. A little more. An entire man. Finally, the whole painting was in view. The priest on the DVD said that we have to remember that in our own little world, we might just be able to see dots. We have no idea that others see different dots. Or that they all work together to create the masterpiece that God has created. We have to trust that He sees everything we can't.

Last weekend's school shooting has made me question Him yet again. I think it's hit me even harder because we have a six year old, and school is one place where she should always feel safe and loved. Facebook has been bombarded by people who are praying for Newtown, but there are also plenty who want to know where God was and how He could permit this to happen. I don't have the answers, and I don't know why my own family has had more than its fair share of loss. But I have to believe once again, that this is the same God who stood by when His son died. A friend of mine said there's a statue of Jesus across from the OKC building that was bombed in 1995. He's turned away from the building with His face in His hands and it says, "And Jesus Wept."

I'm holding my babies a little closer this week, even though I've seen how fast things can change. Unfortunately, it's hard to truly live each day to its fullest and not take things for granted. Real life gets in the way and it's way too easy to get mad about the toys left in the hallway or the towel that never stays on the rack or the refrigerator that's always open. And right now, to be honest, I'm a little "blah" because both girls are under the weather, I took off today, I may have to take off tomorrow and holiday plans are up in the air. But if I stop and take a deep breath--I'm blessed. I still get to tuck my babies in tonight and pray with them. We'll pray to a God who's always working on that perfect masterpiece--and we teeny little dots don't have to understand.

All in the Family

In-laws get a bad rap. We all know the (appropiately enough) in-laws from Kansas who show up unannounced at Christmas. "That there is an RV, Clark. . . ." Everybody Loves Raymond based an entire show on living across the street from your mother-in-law. (And to say it wasn't pretty is putting it mildly. Can you even imagine having Marie as a mother-in-law?) There are houses with "mother-in-law quarters". . . because they can't possibly share any breathing room with us. . . And the jokes and the stereotypes go on, and on, and on. After eleven years of marriage, I finally hosted my first Thanksgiving last week. The in-laws were here for five days. And we had a great time. Really. No punchlines or "insert in-law bashing here." Not to say that we haven't had issues--that happens even with blood relatives. It's like anything else: you take the good with the bad, roll with the punches, and somehow muddle through life together.

After fifteen years of knowing my in-laws, I'm learning to appreciate the things I gain from the people I chose when I chose their son:

1. They bring something new--literally--to the table. Is it weird for my Irish mother-in-law to make Chinese noodles for our American Thanksgiving? Yes. Are they tasty? Definitely. And do my kids expect them for holidays now? You bet.

2. All the crafts and projects that I don't have patience for. . . Grandma was BORN to do. The woman sat at our kitchen bar on Saturday for hours with a hot glue gun and a foam nativity scene. The girls came and went but she kept right on working. And it was ok that the donkey's ears were upside down (surely there was something at Jesus's birth that resembled a hamster, wasn't there?) and that the sequins were missing--again. Mama probably wouldn't have been half as calm, cool, and collected.

3. There are 21 years of my husband's life that I'm not a part of. And I love that these people know those stories and can tell my girls. Daddy used to set up snake traps with his imaginary friends, Cowboy and H Pom Poon (Yes, that was really his name. Hey. . . . maybe that's where the Chinese noodle recipe came from. . . ) He fell out of his crib at 18 months and broke his arm. He built the canoe that we take out every summer in the basement of my in-laws' home. Sometimes I forget that once upon a time, the man I love was the little boy that they raised.

4. It's ok to be the bad person. I've gotten upset in the past when I'm JUST the mom and my girls' aunties and grandparents get all the glory. No one wants Mom when they're around, the girls cry when they leave, there aren't any rules until mean old Mommy butts in and makes everyone's lives miserable. Or so it seems. But then I remember that my girls will have lots of aunties, lots of cousins, two grandmas, two papas. . . and one Mom. And I'm not here to spoil them and give them everything they want. It IS about being the bad guy: teaching them right from wrong, helping them make good choices, and making sure they're ready someday to get married and have their own families. And then I can sit back and do foam crafts and spoil their kiddos rotten. :)

5. Even when it's hard, it's worth it. I know we don't always see eye-to-eye and that there's a fair amount of tongue biting from all parties involved, but I'm truly blessed to have these people who raised the man who is raising my babies. I know that part of what made me fall in love with R was loving the family he came from. And I'm so glad that they're a part of my daughters' lives. They can roll up in the R.V. at our place anytime. As long as Chinese noodles are involved.

Back to the Future

Whoever said high school is the best time of your life never went to college. :) I loved college. I've said more than once that I'd go back in a heartbeat. SO many memories of E-town!

Mondays meant 10 cent wings at Noah's.
Thursday was 50 cent tacos at Babe's, and of course, Karaoke.
After singing like a rock star, you could go next door to Lewis and Clark's/Buckets/The Outback. . . Luckily its popularity didn't change like the name. It was always THE place to go.
Then at 2 am, nothing was better than going next door again--Pyramid Pizza. It was even good during daylight hours when you were fully-functioning. :) That braided crust dipped in honey. . . Yes, honey. . .
Godfather's Pizza offered free buffets if you could sink the Nerf ball in the hoop hanging behind the register.
Bruff's had amazing pin tacos and a fun dance floor upstairs.
Turtles had big schooners and shuffleboard tables.
My first date with R was at Coach's. I can still see exactly where we sat and the long sleeves he wore on the last day of April to hide poison ivy. :)
If you could stand the smell of IBP (Iowa Beef Processors) across the highway, Carlos O'Kelly's was the place to go for margaritas and (FREE) baskets of chips and salsa. . . Who needs to order a meal?
The Dugout had cheap pitchers. . . And they didn't really mind if you weren't 21. . . Oops.
Lugens had a big outdoor "beer garden"--seriously cool.
I waited tables at McGillicutty's and learned you shouldn't date a co-worker because it's not fun to work with your ex-boyfriend. . .
At Johnny's, you could have your own mug on the wall (Hubby's self-proclaimed label read "Captain.")

It's really no surprise that the "Freshman 15" exists. . . I'm more shocked that it's not the Freshman 50. Is it sad that so many fun times involved food and. . . beverages?

Last weekend was bittersweet for me. E-Town obviously holds a special place in my life for numerous reasons. It's where I met some of my closest friends. It's where my dream to teach became a reality. It's where I first realized my love for libraries. It's where I met the man I would later marry. Not to mention all the fun! :) It was great to re-live our college memories, but it was also sad to visit our old stomping grounds.

Sitting at the stadium and "people-watching," I realized that it's no longer "OUR" college. This year's freshman are half--HALF--our age. They have no clue who we are--nor do they care. Noah's, Babe's, Lewis and Clark's/Buckets/The Outback, Pyramid Pizza, Godfather's, Turtles, Carlos O'Kelly's, The Dugout, Lugen's and Johnny's. . . . all GONE.

Bruff's and Coach's have both moved to different buildings--which just isn't the same. We tried to re-create our first date last Saturday (minus the poison ivy) but I couldn't shake the feeling that we were in a Mexican restaurant; it wasn't the Coach's I remember. McGillicutty's ironically enough is now La Hacienda. Driving around, I got more and more depressed and finally blurted out, "Why can't it just be 1997 again?!"

And then it hit me. Thank goodness it's not. If it were, I'd still be a 21 year old college girl, not the person I've grown to be. I wouldn't have my babies. I wouldn't have my husband. I wouldn't have THIS life.

E-town is still an awesome college town. And the kids there probably can't imagine life without Natasha's (new bar on Commercial) or Wheat State Pizza (in Godfather's old building--I have to admit it was awesome. Even without the Nerf ball.) They'll have a different set of memories to take with them in four short years.

And at the end of the weekend, I took my own memories with me. No, E-town isn't what it used to be, but neither am I. Luckily though, some things never change. I still got to drive a cute boy home. And this time I didn't just drop him off at the door.